


The Heat Does Things to a Person, Man

by JennerJen



Series: Underneath Your Clothes [1]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Clint is whiny, Gen, JARVIS is Snarky, Other people suffer, Rated for Clint's mouth, this is what happens when Tony wants something
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-29
Updated: 2015-05-29
Packaged: 2018-04-01 19:42:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 838
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4032277
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JennerJen/pseuds/JennerJen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Side drabble to my story Underneath Your Clothes (WinterIron)</p><p>What happens when Clint is hot and whiny, and Jarvis is conspiring with Tony? Nothing good.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Heat Does Things to a Person, Man

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Seneschal](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Seneschal/gifts).



> Seneschal wanted to see a story about Clint's legs from my UYC story. So I tried. Hope you giggle.

CockSUCKER it was hot in here. Shouldn't Jarvis be monitoring the air flow, and individual body temperatures or something so that everyone wasn't sweating out enough liquid to fill a kiddie pool? And, oh God, was that a visual he could've done without. Ugh, where’s the brain bleach when you needed it?

Clint was dying. No. Really, he was. After all the bullshit alien attacks and killer robots and wannabe villains, he was going to die of heat stroke because Tony Stark’s AI decided to take a vacation. Or throw a hissy fit. Clint narrowed his eyes at the ceiling suspiciously. Maybe this was revenge for him calling Jarvis ‘Skynet -in-training’. But seriously? Creepy omniscient computer voice in the sky? It’s just asking for a worldwide takeover. 

He wiggled himself a little lower into the leather couch cushions trying to find a cool spot. Hint: there were no cool spots, because it was fucking HOT. Thumping his head on the back rest, Clint closed his eyes, and crossed his arms, only to uncross them pretty quickly when they slid together and the warmth intensified. 

“Jarvis,” Clint whined to the ceiling. “C’mon man, be a good bro and help me out here. I’m sorry I called you Skynet? It’s too hot for those of us with bodies, man.” Opening one eye, he pouted outrageously. 

“I am very sorry for you discomfort Agent Barton,” And yep, there was a bit of snark under that British tone. “I am however unable to aide you currently. Sir has determined that my systems are not, I quote, ‘performing up to snuff,’ and has thus began a rather detailed inspection of my code. The air conditioning should return to working order tomorrow morning, barring any further problems Sir may find.” The only thing cool in this god damn tower was Jarvis’ attitude.

“Uuuuuuuugh.”

“Quite Agent Barton.” There was definitely amusement lacing Jarvis’ voice now.

This sucked. He was alone in this freaking death-trap and…

Wait.

Wait just a flipping minute.

He was alone. Clint was ALONE. Here. Right now. He was alone in this tower and… 

A huge grin took over his face and he heaved himself off the couch. Really, it was Stark’s fault, he told himself as he chucked his shirt over his head and tossed it somewhere behind him. He slid his cotton pyjama pants down his legs, and then he was standing clothed only in some bright purple boxer briefs. He stretched his arms up over his head and leaned backwards. It wasn't much, but it helped a bit. He was sure Tasha would've smacked him for even thinking about lounging around in his undies, but the heat did funny things to the mind. Maybe there was ice cream in the freezer? He could watch My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding and gorge on a cool treat. Peeeeeerfect. Gosh, he was smart. 

He was making his way back to the couch with his prize, dancing a bit because, yes things were looking up and didn't hear the elevator signal an arrival. 

“Gaaah!”

Clint whipped around to the strangled noise, and found Tony standing there, eyes bugged out and staring directly at-

“Hey, my eyes are up here buddy!”

“Jesus Clint!” Tony snapped out. “What are you doing?! Put some fucking clothes on, God! What’s wrong with you! Wait, don’t answer that, one, because I probably don’t have time to listen to all of it, and two, I don’t actually ca…” his eyes had started to drift below the waist again. 

Clint used a free hand to snap his fingers at Tony’s face and waited until Tony’s head had jerked up to stare at him. “Dude… it’s ridiculous in here. You’re lucky that I kept the underwear on man, it was a close call. But, ya gotta do what ya gotta do. And I gotta do this.”

Clint turned around with a flourish and went to settle down in front of the couch, no way was he going to stick to the leather seats. He turned back to ask Tony if he wanted to get in on the ice cream and mindless TV, when he noticed Tony was blinking fast and had his head turned considering Clint.

“Correct me if I'm wrong,” and that sounded like the start of something that Clint didn't want to hear. “But,” and a slight hesitation… from Stark? And was that? Was that a blush across the bridge of his nose? “Did you wax your legs?”

“Well DUH! Do you see how tight those uniform pants are?”

More blinking, a head shake to clear his thoughts, and Tony grinned down at Clint. “Well, I guess if you've got it, you should flaunt it Barton, and you, my friend, have apparently got it.” With a wink and suggestive leer, Tony headed to the kitchen, and grabbed a cold bottle of water which he used to salute Clint with before heading back to his workshop.

He also left Clint wondering if maybe he should put his pants back on.


End file.
